I was talking to a friend once about how she was approached by a neighbor and told that she needed to dress more modestly because she was an example to her daughter. I was just thinking about what that means to me.
I realized that it is not the responsibility of anyone in my child's life to be their example. It is mine. It's my job to show and teach them what my expectations are. It is my job to teach them that everyone has their choices. We may not always agree with them but it is their choice.
If I want to teach my kids a particular modesty standard for dressing, I teach them. I don't rely on someone else. If I want to teach them about consequences for choices, whether it be drugs, sex or anything else they will come up against, it's my job. I chose to have my kids, I need to take the time to at least teach them and then let them make their choices.
I understand that we all judge people by a first glance or we judge by our standards, but that doesn't mean we are better than them or that our standards are more correct then theirs. It means that we can disagree and still be charitable loving human beings.
So far this year is full of epiphanies for me and I hope that I can be that good example to my kids.
